Turning Thirty
Turning thirty has been so surreal. It doesn’t feel like it’s actually happening, like I’m watching time fly past me but I can’t even appreciate it or experience it fully. And it. Just. Keeps. Going. I’m going to turn thirty-two in a few months and I feel like I can’t keep up. A lot of really great things have happened since I turned thirty and also some pretty crappy things. Hard lessons and traumatic events seem to follow you no matter the age. Which is very disappointing.
Quarantine
The past two years of my life have been difficult, to say the least. First, I was laid off from a job I truly loved. Then, I had a slew of medical issues that came up at the worst time possible. For a year I tried to care for myself in the best ways I knew how. I went to physical therapy, I went to specialist after specialist to try and figure out the puzzle that is my body, I went to a psychologist and psychiatrist and started working on my PTSD. I thought I was starting to get things under control. This is hilarious because that's right when Quarantine hit. Literally, right as I was hoping to rejoin society, society said "no, thanks though."
For the last year, I have felt more lost than I ever have in my life. I am 29 and feel like a directionless loser. All the things that used to be dreams to me have been systematically crushed over the years. Things like wanting to be a comedian and an FBI profiler. Years of dedication only to be turned away for things out of my control. This past year has been nothing BUT out of my control. This is something I'm sure that a lot of people can relate to. Feeling out of control is terrible, it's one of my least favorite feelings and I have never had to deal with more of it.
During quarantine time has never gone slower or faster simutaneously. I feel like I'm losing so much of my life and I'm going to wake up in my thirties with nothing to show for it. I have things on the horizon, hopes and maybe even a potential dream or two but for now it's hard to not feel like a loser.
We Got Chickens!
In April we did something that we have been dying to do since we moved to Washington. We got chickens! On April first, we picked up our chicks and over the last couple of months it has been amazing to watch them grow into full-fledged hens. Their names are Ripley and Scully because we love ourselves some strong female sci-fi characters. I really couldn't imagine our life without them now. They bring so much joy to our house, even though they WON'T LAY ANY EGGS YET. Lazy chickens. One thing that has been a challenge for sure is acclimating our Husky to the situation. She reaaaaally wants to chase them and I reaaaally don't want her to. But she gets better about interacting with them all the time. She is almost defensive of them now. It's pretty cute.
Please enjoy the following photos of our babies growing up!
The Importance of Trees & Friendship
One of my favorite things about the Redwoods is the bark. The bark sheds like snakeskin and flakes away. It has thousands of layers, changing shades. The smell of a Redwood tree is amazing. Something that was, unfortunately, yesterday, masked by burning barbeque smell. I also hate people, did I mention I hate people? A wasp also ate some of my sandwich and it wouldn't leave us alone. Truly though, nothing cleans the soul better than spending quality time with your BFF.
Anyway, please enjoy my photos of the Redwoods in Yorba Linda
and two photos of some cool leaves because whyyyyy not?